Murder for Hire 

The following is a brief synopsis of our current collection of Murder Mystery scripts. If you are planning a special function and would like to do something a little different around the dinner event, then a Murder Mystery is just the thing. Audience size can range from as little as 50 people up to 200.  Running time is typically about 2.5 hours long.  
 
 The diners are not just passive observers of the entertainment but can participate actively by playing detective and questioning each of the characters individually in an attempt to deduce "who dunit". Prior to the climax of the show, ballots are passed around to all of the diners and they can indicate who they think the culprit ( or culprits) is (or are) and why.

 After the finale and all has been revealed, the ballots are sorted and two prizes are awarded. One ballot is drawn from those that have correctly fingered the guilty party and the person that submitted that ballot wins a prize. The remaining prize is awarded to the person that submits the most creative or amusing reasoning for their deduction, even if it isn't the correct one. Each prize is typically a pair of tickets to the next stage production by The Lakeside Players (an $18 value).

We can tailor an existing script or create a new story line to follow just about any theme you might require. For more information regarding our Murder Mysteries, please contact us (info@lakesideplayers.com

Below are photos of our most recent murder mystery, The Mystery Walk of Ages, performed for The Good Companions Cente.

	Sergei Gouzenko questioning a potential suspect	Isadore Shamir looking for gems	Margie Cantsin explaining her art works	Our host having a chat

 Death by Inheritance

Eighty-three year old Silas F. Rich is throwing his annual Winter Blahs party. His son, daughter and in-laws are attending but upset with "dear old dad" and his new relationship with twenty something Hermione "Chesty" Goldiga. Silas's toothpaste company has been very successful and the kids worry that any inheritance will go to his new-found love.

Cast of Characters: 

   Silas F. Rich: 83 year old industrialist plagued by galloping knee syndrome.

   Hermione (Chesty) Goldiga: Twenty-something aspiring model and Silas's fiancee.

   Willy Rich: Elder son of Silas and successful sanitation engineer.

   Rosy Rich: Devoted wife of Willy and their seven children: Adam, Beth, Calib, Daniel, Esther, Francis and Gideon

   Vera Longbottom: Silas's daughter and lawyer for the toothpaste company. 

   Norm Longbottom: Vera's husband and Doctor of Criminology

   Irma Goodkiss: 81, going on 39, year old spinster and Silas's high school sweetheart.

   Ripley Muscles: Owner and operator of Ripley's Believe it or Not Gym and sometimes mob "collector".

   Detective Inspector Witless: That's pronounced Whiteless!!

   Sergeant Sharp: Young, keen and corrects his superiors malapropisms and spoonerisms.

The Wedding That Never Was

Along around 1931 a small group of people gathered together to witness the marriage of Effie and Lot. A bolt of lightning flashed from the sky, struck down the officiating minister and sent everyone into limbo. Every 17 years they reappear at a different wedding and, just when they think they have overcome the curse, the minister is killed again and everyone is sent back into limbo. But perhaps tonight will be different. Perhaps the minister will live long enough to perform the wedding and break the curse.

Cast of Characters:

 Eupemia Swain: Sounds like a train when she gets excited, she huffs and puffs - the ever hopefull bride

 Lot Singular: The groom - part time cad, part time gypsy. Sells horses of dubious origin.

 Medusa: Jilted by Lot for a "gadge" girl and remains true to her gypsy teachings.

 Madame Pru: The gyspy with the gold-capped tooth and Lot's grandmother.

 Violet Gray: Eupemias Aunt who looked after the bride since her mother died and father disappeared years ago.

 Fergus Swain: aka Sootie the Tramp. Spends a lot of time around camp fires, but has cleaned up for the wedding.

 Folk John Henderson: Peddlar man, goes from farm to farm. People call him plain Folk

 Brother Love: Somehow got transported from his travelling salvation show to officiate at tonights wedding.

 Homer Watson: Delivers mail in the area and somehow knows what every letter says

Rock on to the Olympics

 The Rocking Chair Association is attempting to have rocking entered as a sport in the next Olympics. The RCA has hired Henry Grist to lobby the International Olympic Committee and so far things have been running along smoothly. Today is the final opportunity for the group to show how popular the sport is with the audience. Today we a seeing the creme de la creme of the rocking world. 

Cast of Characters 

  Yuan Sanshis Ranch: Olympic official sent to judge the appeal of rocking as a sport    Henry Grist: Event organizer hired by RCA to lobby the International Olympic Committee  

 John Gumm: Coach of the Gus Gryphons Rocking Team. Was a very successful rocker but switched interests to gardening

 Eugene Bronson: Gus Gryphons competitor

 Esther Bronson: Gus Gryphons competitor

 Charles McNab: Abbotsford House Extreme Rockers. Believes in lots of warm up and strengthening activities

 Alex Pratt: Abbotsford House competitor, wins at all costs

 C. H. Pinhey: Abbotsford House competitor, excels in the Mother's rock category.

 Chris Topley: Chair Handler responsible for keeping chairs running smoothly and in tip-top shape

One Bad Apple

The town of Crabtree Corners is having their annual celebrity apple pie bake-off. Each contestand is given a standard pie plate to ensure anonymity during judgind. There are seven finalists. As can be expected, one of the apple pies causes a certain amount of "physical distress" to one of the characters to the point that they are rendered "life-signs challenged". The difficulty for the investigator arises from the fact that the apple pies are indistinguishable from the each other. Attending the bake-off are: 

 Margaret MacIntosh: President of Crabtree Corners Regional Apple Producers (CCRAP)

 Johnny Chapman: Vice President of CCRAP and official taste tester.

 Reverend Al Crumble:  Former army chaplin, rumoured not to have had an honourable discharge.  Doris received a doctorate in Science specializing in environmental studies, from the University of Guelph.

 Jennifer Felcher, Mystery Writer:  A real busybody and tells everyone what they should do.

 Police Chief Cecil Cider:  Don tries to do right by his friends and sees nothing wrong in "fixing" parking tickets.  He's a real red-neck conservative.

 Mayor Gertrude Smith (Grannie to some).   She is a real concerned politician with a big smile and a warm handshake.

 Doris Yamaha, Environmentalist: 

 Peyton Place Ex-Wife  Paula Red: has won this event for the past nine years and expects to win again.

 Conrad White, Newspaper Editor: "Connie" is editor and publisher of The Crabtree Chronicles and sometimes offends his readers with his liberal views

The Dildo Conspiracy

We are celebrating the 80th birthday of Preston Amesley-Faversham-Barton, owner and founder of Faversham Safe and Dildo Co. Ltd. Preston's philanthropy is well known. Unfortunately, it does not extend to his family who are all gathered here to see what valued heirlooms he is donating.

This of course, leads to some tension between family members.

The Cast of Characters:

     Preston Amesley-Faversham-Barton
     Edwin, the eldest and most responsible son
     Maude, 3rd and current wife of Preston
     Wilhemina, daughter and woman of loosely-woven moral fibre
     Charles, son and crusading environmentalist of uncertain political
     persuasion and artist of scant repute
     Polly, secretary to Preston, insufferable and ever present
     Lucy Brock, sister-in-law, sister to Diana, Prestons 2nd wife
     Inspector Kluneau 

Exterminator Surprise

The Dolan Brothers are here to give a demonstration of some of the fine products from their extermination business. Their motto: "Something Bugging You? We have the solution." Unfortunately, bugs aren't the only thing to get squashed in this scenario.

The Cast of Characters:

     Darwin Dolan: Founder and president of Dolan Brothers Extermination
     Darryl Dolan: Darwin's older brother. Spends more time at the track than he does at work
     Dora Dolan: The matriarch of the family
     Violet Minelli: Darwin's girlfriend. Usually under some sort of sedation.
     Vinnie Minelli: Violet's brother and tough mafioso
     Stella Street: Employed by Vinnie to be Violet's "companion"
     Myrtle Peach: Vinnie's moll
     Father Francis Murphy: Family friend and consummate Irish priest
     Harri Steele: Tough-nosed undercover RCMP investigator. 

Micro Mayhem

Gill Bates, president and founder of Micro-Shaft Inc. is here to promote his new book "The Trail Forward" and the latest edition of the computer operating system Doors '98. Gill's marketing practices has upset more than his competitors.

The Cast of Characters:

     Gill Bates: Billionaire computer products company president
     Kathy Bates: His wife and ultimate computer geek
     Sharon Pliers: Micro-shafts project manager from hell
     Karl (Killer) Kenosee: Gill's bodyguard. A man of few words and fewer brain cells
     Frankie Hoffman: President of the Canadian Shrink Wrappers Union. Currently in contract dispute with Micro-shaft.
     Paul McCarty: (nee Paul Bates) Brother of Gill and bandleader of Paul
     McCarty and Rings.
     Stefan Wasinski: President of Pear Computers, Micro-shafts main competitor.
     Crystal Ball: Owner of Crytal's Psychic Hotline
     Inspector Dudley: RCMP investigator looking into trade union wrong doings 

The Legend of Sleepy Head

I.C. Bob Crane, president and CEO of Crane Pharmaceuticals and Remedies has recently awoke from a coma and is throwing a coming out party. He is convinced that one of his family or employees are responsible for delivering him into the arms of morpheus. He has hired his limousine driver and clairvoyant xx to try and expose the culprit.

The Cast of Characters:

I.C. Bob Crane: Ruthless industrialist, unconscionably uses employees
Eleanor Lake-Palmer: His wife. Plays the part of the proper business woman.
Katie Crain: Their daughter. She would be out to lunch if her picnic basket was full.
Rock Cuisine: Aspiring soft-rock star and current boyfriend of Katie
F.G. Daly: Corporate lawyer for CPR. Gained notoriety for his courtroom antics during his time as Queen's Council
Eve Garden: Bitter but brilliant chemist. Works tirelessly in the CPR labs.
Moe Clark: Aspiring political hope. 

The Mystery Walk of Ages

 According to legend, the ancient Olympic Games were founded by Heracles, the son of Zeus. Since this was a most auspicious event, and occurred only once every four years, everyone in ancient Greece and the surrounding area, made their way to Olympia. Many would make the trek on foot and were expected to attend at least one Olympic Games in their lifetime. The journey held as much importance as the games themselves and came to be known as “The walk that took ages”, or less literally translated “The Walk of Ages”.  During the journey of 776 BC a traveler found a small diamond which he presented to one of the Olympic athletes. Since then the “Walk of Ages Diamond” has been passed down through the ages and those who received it have good fortune and honour.

The Cast of Characters:

  Sergei Gouzenko: Ex-KGB and current CSIS agent. He has been tracking the diamond since it’s disappearance after the 1980 Moscow Olympics

  Isadore Shamir: World’s greatest diamond dealer and campaigner against diamonds used to finance terrorism

  Margie Kantsin : Representation artist of dubious talent

  Emily Kelly: Light-fingered clown well know at the police station.

  Barbara Bonds: Professional baseball player who is trying to get into the Hall of Fame.

  Roger Balustrade : Perennial marathon also ran.

  Martha Crocker: Cook book author.

  Lil Darling: Socialite and serial widow.